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George Carlin, George Carlin - We Like War

George Carlin - We Like War

Well, we like war!

We like war! We're a war-like people! We like war because we're good at it! You know why we're good at it? Cause we get a lot of practice. This country's only 200 years old and already, we've had 10 major wars. We average a major war every 20 years in this country so we're good at it! And it's a good thing we are; we're not very good at anything else anymore! Huh? Can't build a decent car, can't make a TV set or a VCR worth a fuck, got no steel industry left, can't educate our young people, can't get health care to our old people, but we can bomb the shit out of your country all right! Huh? Especially if your country is full of brown people; oh we like that don't we? That's our hobby! That's our new job in the world: bombing brown people. Iraq, Panama, Grenada, Libya, you got some brown people in your country, tell them to watch the fuck out or we'll goddamn bomb them! Well when's the last white people you can remember that we bombed? Can you remember the last white--- can you remember ANY white people we've ever bombed? The Germans, those are the only ones and that's only because they were trying to cut in on our action. They wanted to dominate the world! BULLSHIT! THAT'S OUR FUCKING JOB! Now, we only bomb brown people – not because they're trying to cut in on our action – just because they're brown. Now you probably noticed I don't feel about that war the way we were told we were supposed to feel about that war, the way we were ordered and instructed by the United States government to feel about that war. You see, I tell ya, my mind doesn't work that way. I got this real moron thing I do; it's called “thinking”, and I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions. I don't just roll over when I'm told to. Sad to say, most Americans just roll over <snap> on command, not me. I have certain rules I live by; my first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me... nothing, zero, no, and I don't take very seriously, the media or the press in this country, who in the case of the Persian Gulf war were nothing more than unpaid employees of the Department of Defence, and who most of the time, most of the time functioned as kind of an unofficial public relations agency for the United States government. So I don't listen to them, I don't really believe in my country and I gotta tell you folks, I don't get all choked up about yellow ribbons and American flags. I consider them to be symbols and I leave symbols to the symbol-minded.

Me?

I look at war a little bit differently. To me, war is a lot of prick-waving okay? Simple thing, that's all it is, war is a whole lot of men standing out in a field waving their pricks at one another. Men are insecure about the size of their dicks and so they have to kill one another over the idea. That's what all that asshole, jock bullshit is all about. That's what all that adolescent, macho-male posturing, and strutting in bars and locker rooms is all about, it's called “dick fear!” Men are terrified that their pricks are inadequate and so they have to compete with one another to feel better about themselves and since war is the ultimate competition, basically, men are killing each other in order to improve their self-esteem. You don't have to be a historian or a political scientist to see the Bigger Dick foreign policy theory at work. It sounds like this: “What? They have bigger dicks? BOMB THEM! !” And of course, the bombs and the rockets and the bullets are all shaped like dicks. It's a subconscious need to project the penis into other people's affairs. It's called: “FUCKING WITH PEOPLE! !”

So as far as I'm concerned, that whole thing in the Persian Gulf is nothing more than a biiiiiig prick-waving dick fight. In this particular case, Saddam Hussein had questioned the size of George Bush's dick and George Bush has been called a wimp for so long – “wimp” rhymes with “limp” – George has been called a wimp for so long, that he has to act out his manhood fantasies by sending other people's children to die. Even the name... “Bush”... even the name, “Bush”, is related to the genitals without being the genitals. A bush is a sort of passive, secondary, sex characteristic. Now if this man's name had been George Boner, well, he might've felt a little bit better about himself and we wouldn't have had any trouble over there in the first place. This whole country has a manhood problem, biiiiiig manhood problem in the USA.

You can tell from the language we use; language always gives you away. What did we do wrong in Vietnam? We pulled out! Huh? Not a very manly thing to do is it? When you're fucking people, you gotta stay in there and fuck them good! Fuck ‘em all the way! Fuck ‘em ‘til the end! Fuck ‘em to death! Fuck ‘em to death! Fuck ‘em to death! Stay in there and keep fucking them until they're all dead! We left a few women and children alive in Vietnam and we haven't felt good about ourselves since. That's why in the Persian Gulf, George Bush had to say “this will not be another Vietnam!” He actually used these words, he said: “This time, we're going all the way!” Imagine, an American president using the sexual slang of a 13 year-old to describe his foreign policy. If you wanna know what happened in the Persian Gulf, just remember the names of the two men who were running that war: Dick Cheney and Colin Powell... somebody got fucked in the ass!

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Well, we like war!

We like war! We're a war-like people! We like war because we're good at it! You know why we're good at it? Cause we get a lot of practice. This country's only 200 years old and already, we've had 10 major wars. |이 나라의||||||||| We average a major war every 20 years in this country so we're good at it! And it's a good thing we are; we're not very good at anything else anymore! Huh? Can't build a decent car, can't make a TV set or a VCR worth a fuck, got no steel industry left, can't educate our young people, can't get health care to our old people, but we can bomb the shit out of your country all right! ||||||||||||VCR||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||все| Ми не можемо побудувати пристойну машину, не можемо зробити телевізор чи відеомагнітофон варті хрена, не залишимо сталеливарної промисловості, не можемо навчити наших молодих людей, не можемо забезпечити медичне обслуговування наших старих, але ми можемо розбомбити лайно з вашої країни добре! Huh? Especially if your country is full of brown people; oh we like that don't we? |||||||коричневих||||||| That's our hobby! That's our new job in the world: bombing brown people. |||||||бомбування|| Iraq, Panama, Grenada, Libya, you got some brown people in your country, tell them to watch the fuck out or we'll goddamn bomb them! ||그레나다|리비아|||||||||||||||||||| ||Гренада|||||||||||||||||||чорт забирай|| 이라크, 파나마, 그레나다, 리비아, 당신네 나라에 갈색 사람들이 있으면 조심하라고 말하지 않으면 폭격할 거야! Ірак, Панама, Гренада, Лівія, у вас є деякі коричневі люди у вашій країні, скажіть їм, щоб пильнували до біса, або ми їх розбомбимо! Well when's the last white people you can remember that we bombed? |언제||||||||||폭격당한 우리가 폭격했던 백인이 마지막으로 기억나는 게 언제죠? Can you remember the last white--- can you remember ANY white people we've ever bombed? 마지막으로 폭격했던 백인--- 우리가 폭격했던 백인을 기억하시나요? The Germans, those are the only ones and that's only because they were trying to cut in on our action. |||||||||||||||||||행동 독일군, 그것만이 유일하게 우리의 행동을 방해하려고 했기 때문입니다. They wanted to dominate the world! BULLSHIT! дурниця THAT'S OUR FUCKING JOB! 그게 바로 우리 일입니다! Now, we only bomb brown people – not because they're trying to cut in on our action – just because they're brown. 이제 우리는 단지 갈색이라는 이유만으로, 우리의 행동에 방해가 되려고 해서가 아니라 갈색이라는 이유만으로 흑인들을 폭격합니다. Now you probably noticed I don't feel about that war the way we were told we were supposed to feel about that war, the way we were ordered and instructed by the United States government to feel about that war. |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||지시된|||||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||замовлений||інструктували|||||||||| 이제 여러분은 제가 그 전쟁에 대해 우리가 그 전쟁에 대해 느껴야 한다고 들었던 방식, 미국 정부가 명령하고 지시한 방식대로 전쟁에 대해 느끼지 않는다는 것을 눈치챘을 것입니다. You see, I tell ya, my mind doesn't work that way. ||||너에게|||||| 제 마음은 그런 식으로 작동하지 않습니다. I got this real moron thing I do; it's called “thinking”, and I'm not a very good American because I like to form my own opinions. ||||바보||||||||||||||||||||| ||||морон||||||||||||||||||||| 저는 '생각하기'라는 정말 바보 같은 일을 하는데, 저는 제 의견을 형성하는 것을 좋아해서 미국인답지 못합니다. I don't just roll over when I'm told to. |||крутитися||||| 저는 시킨다고 해서 그냥 넘어가지 않습니다. Я не переворачиваюсь, когда мне говорят. Я не просто перевертаюся, коли мені кажуть. Sad to say, most Americans just roll over <snap> on command, not me. ||||||||딱 소리|||| ||||||||по команді|||| К сожалению, большинство американцев просто переворачиваются по команде, а не мне. I have certain rules I live by; my first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me... nothing, zero, no, and I don't take very seriously, the media or the press in this country, who in the case of the Persian Gulf war were nothing more than unpaid employees of the Department of Defence, and who most of the time, most of the time functioned as kind of an unofficial public relations agency for the United States government. |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||페르시아|걸프||||||무급 직원|직원들|||||국방|||||||||||기능했다|||||비공식||관계|홍보 대행사||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||функціонували||||||||||||| So I don't listen to them, I don't really believe in my country and I gotta tell you folks, I don't get all choked up about yellow ribbons and American flags. |||||||||||||||||||||||감정이 북받치다||||||| |||||||||||||||||||||||||||стрічки||| بنابراین من به آنها گوش نمی دهم ، من واقعاً به کشور خودم اعتقادی ندارم و باید به شما مردم بگویم ، همه روبان های زرد و پرچم های آمریکایی را خفه نمی کنم. 그래서 저는 그들의 말을 듣지 않고, 조국을 믿지 않으며, 노란 리본과 성조기 때문에 가슴이 답답하지 않다고 말씀드리고 싶어요. Поэтому я их не слушаю, я не очень верю в свою страну и должен сказать вам, друзья, я не задыхаюсь от желтых ленточек и американских флагов. Тож я їх не слухаю, я не дуже вірю в свою країну, і мушу вам сказати, люди, що мене не хвилюють жовті стрічки та американські прапори. I consider them to be symbols and I leave symbols to the symbol-minded. |||||상징들||||||||상징적인 사고 저는 그것들을 상징이라고 생각하며 상징은 상징을 생각하는 사람에게 맡깁니다. Я считаю их символами и оставляю символы мыслящим символом.

Me?

I look at war a little bit differently. 저는 전쟁을 조금 다르게 바라봅니다. To me, war is a lot of prick-waving okay? 저에게 전쟁은 막무가내로 휘두르는 것이죠? Для меня война - это сплошь размахивать уколом, понятно? Для мене війна — це багато махання уколами, добре? Simple thing, that's all it is, war is a whole lot of men standing out in a field waving their pricks at one another. |||||||||||||서 있는|||||||||| 전쟁이란 그저 수많은 남자들이 들판에 서서 서로에게 총을 휘두르는 것일 뿐입니다. Простая вещь, вот и все, война - это множество людей, стоящих на поле и машущих друг другу уколами. Men are insecure about the size of their dicks and so they have to kill one another over the idea. ||||||||자신의 성기||||||||||| 남성들은 자신의 성기 크기에 대해 불안해하기 때문에 그 생각 때문에 서로를 죽여야 합니다. That's what all that asshole, jock bullshit is all about. |||||운동선수|||| 그 모든 개자식, 운동선수들의 헛소리가 바로 그것입니다. Dat is waar al die klootzak, onzin over gaat. Ось у чому полягає вся ця мудачна фігня. That's what all that adolescent, macho-male posturing, and strutting in bars and locker rooms is all about, it's called “dick fear!” Men are terrified that their pricks are inadequate and so they have to compete with one another to feel better about themselves and since war is the ultimate competition, basically, men are killing each other in order to improve their self-esteem. ||||청소년|남성적인||자세 취하기||허세 부리기||||사물함||||||||||||||||부족한||||||경쟁하다||||||||||||||궁극적인||||||||||||||자존감 |||||||||позувати||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||самоповага 사춘기 남성들이 술집이나 라커룸에서 마초적인 자세를 취하고 뽐내는 것은 모두 '거시기 공포'에 대한 것입니다. 남성들은 자신의 거시기가 부족하다는 것을 두려워하기 때문에 서로 경쟁해야만 자신에 대해 더 잘 느낄 수 있고, 전쟁은 궁극적으로 경쟁이기 때문에 기본적으로 남성들은 자존감을 높이기 위해 서로를 죽이고 있습니다. Ось у чому полягає вся ця підліткова, мачо-чоловіча поза та гуляння в барах і роздягальнях, це називається «страх члена!» Чоловіки налякані тим, що їхні уколи неадекватні, тому їм доводиться змагатися один з одним, щоб почувати себе краще, а оскільки війна є найвищою конкуренцією, в основному чоловіки вбивають один одного, щоб підвищити свою самооцінку. You don't have to be a historian or a political scientist to see the Bigger Dick foreign policy theory at work. 역사학자나 정치학자가 아니어도 비거 딕 외교 정책 이론이 작동하는 것을 볼 수 있습니다. It sounds like this: “What? They have bigger dicks? |||члени BOMB THEM! !” And of course, the bombs and the rockets and the bullets are all shaped like dicks. |||||||로켓들|||||||| |||||||ракети|||||||| !" 물론 폭탄과 로켓, 총알은 모두 고추 모양입니다. It's a subconscious need to project the penis into other people's affairs. |||||||남근|||| ||підсвідома|||||||||справи інших Это подсознательная потребность проецировать пенис на дела других людей. It's called: “FUCKING WITH PEOPLE! ||підколювати|| "FUCKING WITH PEOPLE!"이라고 합니다. Это называется: «ТРАХАТЬСЯ С ЛЮДЯМИ! Називається: «ХОРІТЬСЯ З ЛЮДЯМИ! !” !"

So as far as I'm concerned, that whole thing in the Persian Gulf is nothing more than a biiiiiig prick-waving dick fight. ||||||||||||||||||엄청난|||| ||||||||||||||||||великий|показуха|мастурбування|| 그래서 제가 보기에 페르시아만에서의 모든 일은 그저 거시기를 흔들며 싸우는 것에 지나지 않습니다. Так что, насколько я понимаю, все это в Персидском заливе - не что иное, как настоящая драка с уколами. In this particular case, Saddam Hussein had questioned the size of George Bush's dick and George Bush has been called a wimp for so long – “wimp” rhymes with “limp” – George has been called a wimp for so long, that he has to act out his manhood fantasies by sending other people's children to die. ||||사담 후세인|후세인||||||||||||||||약한 자||||약한 사람|운율||허약한 사람|||||||||||||||||남성다움|환상||||||| ||||Саддам Хусейн|Хусейн|||||||Буша|||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||чоловічість|||||||| 사담 후세인은 조지 부시의 거시기 크기에 의문을 제기했고, 조지 부시는 오랫동안 겁쟁이("겁쟁이"는 "절름발이"와 운율이 맞는다)로 불리며 남의 자식을 죽음으로 내몰아 자신의 남성적 판타지를 실현해야만 했습니다. У цьому конкретному випадку Саддам Хусейн поставив під сумнів розмір члена Джорджа Буша, і Джорджа Буша так довго називали слабаком – «слабак» римується зі словом «кульгавий» – Джорджа так довго називали слабаком, що він змушений втілювати свої фантазії про мужність, посилаючи на смерть чужих дітей. Even the name... “Bush”... even the name, “Bush”, is related to the genitals without being the genitals. ||||||||||||생식기|||| ||||||||||||геніталії|||| 심지어 '부시'라는 이름도... '부시'라는 이름조차 성기가 아닌 생식기와 관련이 있습니다. Даже имя ... «Буш» ... даже имя «Буш» связано с гениталиями, но не гениталиями. Навіть ім’я... «Буш»... навіть ім’я «Буш» пов’язане з статевими органами, але не є геніталіями. A bush is a sort of passive, secondary, sex characteristic. |||||||||특징 부시는 일종의 수동적이고 부차적인 성별 특성입니다. Кущ - це якась пасивна, вторинна ознака статі. Now if this man's name had been George Boner, well, he might've felt a little bit better about himself and we wouldn't have had any trouble over there in the first place. ||||||||보너|||일 수도 있었던|||||||||||||||||||| ||||||||Бонер||||||||||||||||||||||| 만약 이 남자의 이름이 조지 보너였다면, 그는 자신에 대해 조금 더 기분이 좋았을 것이고 애초에 문제가 생기지 않았을 것입니다. This whole country has a manhood problem, biiiiiig manhood problem in the USA. |||||чоловічість|||||||

You can tell from the language we use; language always gives you away. Ви можете сказати з мови, яку ми використовуємо; мова завжди видає тебе. What did we do wrong in Vietnam? 베트남에서 우리가 무엇을 잘못했나요? We pulled out! ||вийшли 우리는 철수했습니다! Мы вытащили! Ми витягнули! Huh? 응? Not a very manly thing to do is it? |||남자다운||||| 남자다운 행동이 아니죠? Не очень-то мужественное занятие, правда? When you're fucking people, you gotta stay in there and fuck them good! Fuck ‘em all the way! Fuck ‘em ‘til the end! Fuck ‘em to death! Fuck ‘em to death! Fuck ‘em to death! Stay in there and keep fucking them until they're all dead! 저 안에 남아서 다 죽을 때까지 계속 씹어대세요! We left a few women and children alive in Vietnam and we haven't felt good about ourselves since. 우리는 베트남에 몇 명의 여성과 아이들을 남겨두고 떠났고, 그 이후로 우리 자신에 대해 좋은 감정을 느끼지 못했습니다. That's why in the Persian Gulf, George Bush had to say “this will not be another Vietnam!” He actually used these words, he said: “This time, we're going all the way!” Imagine, an American president using the sexual slang of a 13 year-old to describe his foreign policy. |||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||||성적인|||||||||| 그래서 페르시아만에서 조지 부시는 "이것은 또 다른 베트남이 아닐 것입니다!"라고 말해야 했습니다. "이번에는 끝까지 갈 것입니다!" 미국 대통령이 자신의 외교 정책을 설명하기 위해 13세 소년의 성적인 은어를 사용한다고 상상해 보세요. If you wanna know what happened in the Persian Gulf, just remember the names of the two men who were running that war: Dick Cheney and Colin Powell... somebody got fucked in the ass! ||||||||||||||||||||||||||콜린 파월|콜린 파월|||||| ||||||||||||||||||||||||Дік Чейні||Колін|Пауел|||||| 페르시아만에서 무슨 일이 있었는지 알고 싶다면 당시 전쟁을 지휘했던 두 사람, 딕 체니와 콜린 파월의 이름만 기억하세요... 누군가는 엉덩이를 좆나게 당했습니다! Если вы хотите знать, что произошло в Персидском заливе, просто запомните имена двух мужчин, которые вели эту войну: Дик Чейни и Колин Пауэлл ... кого-то трахнули в задницу!